Sunday, December 12, 2010


On Wednesday night, I got into a really bad accident on the freeway.  I'm pretty sure I blacked out because I can't remember any details, but in short, my car got destroyed.  It looks like this:

As you can see, there is no door there.  They had to cut it off of the car to get me out.  It looks like this:
Now, I knew things were not good when it happened, but I was more concerned with the fact that I was trapped in a car that was leaking gas and I had just felt a hole in my head (I've got some stitches), but seeing it today, I seriously wondered how I lived.

When it happened, I was taken to the ER as a trauma case despite the fact that my only injury was my head.  It was there that I was told that had I been hit just a few inches back, things would have been a lot worse. 

I guess you could say that this is the closest thing to a "near death experience" as I have ever had.  Not in that I got close to death, but in the fact that it was only a few inches that saved me. 

While I am in quite a bit of pain physically (my head hit the window pretty hard apparently, cutting it open and also causing some bruising, so anything involving the left side of my head kind of hurts, and I'm bruised on my left arm/shoulder and leg), the emotional toll is much worse. 

I'm worried and afraid to drive now.  I have driven, but I feel scared and I'm pretty jumpy about it.  I'm worried that I'll get hit again and wont be as lucky this time.  I'm worried that whatever car I get won't protect me the way my car did (I am really sad to lose that car, because I loved it.  Ironically a couple weeks ago I was thinking about what car I would want when that one died, but I couldn't think of one, because I really loved my RAV4).  I have been having trouble sleeping, partially because of physical discomfort, and partially because I keep thinking about it, trying to remember what happened, even though I can't.  I keep remembering the fear I felt, and it's horrible. 

This isn't an exciting or happy post, but just a sort of update.  I probably will not be updating (at least not with fun pictures) for a few weeks since I am not in good shape.  I'm hoping I will be alright soon. 


  1. Oh my word.
    I'm glad you're ok, and I think it's probably quite natural to be scared to drive now.
    The thing to remember though is that road accidents are rare, so there isn't much chance that it will happen again.

  2. Oh my goodness Jen!
    I really hope your feeling okay! That's crazy I can't even believe my eyes. Take care, I hope we can meet soon, ah I miss you!

  3. Wow, I really can't believe how crazy that experience must have been! I'm just glad you're safe! Hopefully the pain and fear with ease away soon. Feel better!!

  4. Hi. (first time commenting on your blog. I found it through the lolita blog post on EGL a month or two back)

    I wanted to let you know that I was in a car accident back in September. It wasn't as bad as yours, but it totaled my car nonetheless, and it left me with bruises and an arm that I couldn't use for about a week. It happened just a block from my school and afterwards I was super nervous about driving, especially in that area. Even now, I'm constantly feeling like something is about to happen. That someone is about to pull out in front of me again or something. Just tonight on my way home from work a car went through a red light while I was turning left on a green arrow and almost hit me. But. Because I'm so nervous about driving now I pay way more attention, almost compulsively. I avoided an accident tonight because I've been on such high alert that I noticed the car going through the intersection when it shouldn't have been.

    So I wanted to say that I understand how you feel. Of COURSE you're nervous about driving again. It's human instinct to avoid things that in our experience have caused us pain. However, now that you've been through that, your brain will automatically pay more attention to the warning signs of a dangerous traffic situation and most likely you'll be better able to avoid another accident in the future. It's best to take baby steps when you're ready. Taking a drive around the block first, then down to the grocery store. Drive like an old lady if it makes you feel more comfortable!

    I also know how you feel about your car. Mine was not one that I picked out--it was kind of a hand-me-down--but that car and I had learned to get along. And it was a good car with a good engine. My new car and I haven't quite figured each other out yet. If you're nervous about how safe cars are, look into the safety ratings before you pick out your new one. That way at least, even if you don't love the new one yet, you'll know you're in a safe vehicle.

    Sorry for the long ramble. ^^; I hope some of that was helpful/reassuring. I'm glad you're okay, and don't worry! Eventually you and the world will start to feel normal again. Especially when you're able to get back into your old routines. :)

  5. Thank you everyone for your kind comments. I am doing much better now; I still have some pain in my head and jaw and I'm slowly driving more. Thanks again for your support.